Haunted Mansion Review!

 Haunted Mansion starts with chills and laughs, then brings some character development and some backstory to the attraction! The classic dark ride opened at Disneyland in 1969. A previous ride adaptation, directed by Rob Minkoff, in 2003. It concerned Eddie Murphy’s Jim Evers ending up with his family at the mansion. The film is directed by Justin Simien who also directed the comedy horror movie, Bad Hair (2020). The screenplay is by Katie Dippold, who also wrote Ghostbusters (2016). It begins with a crystal ball filling the screen resolving to a city. The narrator, Madame Leota (Jamie Lee Curtis) sets the scene, “Welcome foolish mortals. Welcome to New Orleans.” I do like that it is specifically set in New Orleans which is the area, New Orleans Square, in Disneyland. This shifts to a party, there is a photo of the mansion on a mantle, where we see Ben Matthias (LaKeith Stanfield). The actor is known for the comedy drama, Atlanta. 

He encounters a woman, Alyssa (Charity Jordan), who is looking for a drink. Jordan stars as Vivian Long in the comedy, The Wonder Years. He says he is astrophysicist and she tells him, “You’re trying to see the unseen” like her job as a ghost tour guide. The party starts the New Years countdown. This moves later to a bar where Ben is drinking alone while a tour of seven people wait outside. Ben finds out that two women of his group are both named Carol, one of whom is played by Marilu Henner. She stars in the Aurora Teagarden Mysteries and is also known for the comedy show, Taxi. The tour begins at the well known landmark, St. Louis Cathedral, and the tourists ask Ben about ghosts. He stresses that it is a historical walking tour and that ghosts do not exist. Ben as the lead character has a past dealing with Alyssa and has lapsed into a jaded skeptic. 

This goes to a funeral parade emerging from a cemetary where we hear hints of the attraction theme. A UHaul truck passes and we  get a stormy night filled with lightning. The truck at sundown crosses the Lake Pontchartrain Causeway Bridge that spans across the lake. It enters the mansion grounds and stops in its shadow. The driver, Gabbie (Rosario Dawson) gets a call from the movers who are hours behind them. Dawson plays the lead role in the upcoming Ahsoka series. Her young son, Travis (Chase Dillon) starts to walk up to the mansion. Dillon was in the historical mini-series, The Underground Railroad. The mansion doors open and Gabbie tells him to find a room. Travis finds a bed that is drapes over it like fangs! He places a cloth over a painting of The Bride. This is an attraction character who was known as Constance Hatchaway. He hears a laugh that gave me chills. Travis is told, “Welcome home.” Then, The Bride (Lindsay Lamb) appears!   

Travis is terrified, Dillon perfectly captures the withdrawn, shy kid who has to find his courage, and he goes to his mother. She says they only have to light a vanilla scented candle when the helmet of a knight starts to turn. They begin to run out of the mansion with the knight chasing after them! As they drive away, the lantern of the Hatbox Ghost (Jared Leto) tells them, “You’ll be back.” Leto starred as the vampire-like comic character, Morbius (2022). The mysterious character debuted with the opening of the attraction, but then was removed until he reappeared at Disneyland’s mansion in 2015! It shifts to knocking at the door of Ben’s apartment. His unexpected visitor, Father Kent (Owen Wilson) has entered his home with a cat. Wilson plays Mobius in the upcoming second season of Loki. It turns out that the cat does not belong to Ben and he wants Kent out until he brings up spectral, usually called spirit or ghost, photography.  

Ben had discovered what was called the “Ghost Particle” and he lost credibilty in scientific circles. Kent tells him that he got a call from a mother who has a son at a mansion. He offers Ben the chance to be a hero, then two thousand dollars which Ben accepts. Research into the paranormal discrediting scientists like Peter Venkman and then going into business is similar to 1984’s Ghostbusters. He takes out his camera with the quantum lens. Ben reaches the house, but finds that his camera battery is out. He meets with Gabbie at the mansion and she gives him the money before he enters. There is a tent in the library, around the room are several of the Singing Busts, and paintings in the stretching room. It is great to see parts of the attraction, seemingly everyday objects, but with a promise of the paranormal. There is a tent occupied by Travis that Gabbie also uses to get through the night. She explains that she was a doctor in New York, but hoped to open a bed and breakfast in New Orleans. 

Gabbie explains that Travis has difficulty making friends and Ben brings up Action Man figures to connect with Travis. Ben is startled by the suit of armor behind him and pretends to take photos of it. She warns him not to use flash. Gabbie and Travis take Ben into the hallways, at one section, she leaps across because she says there is a sharp pain. Ben casually walks across it. On his own, he starts to walk the halls and passes paintings of a Mariner (Creek Wilson) cutting a turkey, but the painting becomes sinister. At his apartment, Ben has Deadliest Catch on his tv and then sees wet footprints. He replaces the battery for his camera and takes a picture with flash. It knocks him back. Ben opens the door and finds that it opens to the sea! Waves in his living room and he hears a voice say, “Return!” before Ben is washed out to the street! Ben of course returns to the mansion and was expected by Gabbie when she explains that they tried to leave, but the ghosts forced them back. This is a good explanation why characters don’t just leave a haunted place. 

Ben returns to the mansion, Gabbie and Travis expected him, since they also had to return. Kent is also there and Ben shows them the ghost picture of the Mariner. Ben wants to take pictures of every ghost to identify them. He goes to his room and hears from a ghost that wants his soul! Ben is wanted as a victim specifically because of his nature. Kent tells the group that they should assemble a Dream Team. This begins with an univeristy professor, an expert with haunted houses, this is Professor Bruce Davis (Danny DeVito). Max Medici was played by DeVito in the adapation of Dumbo (2019). Ben and Kent find that he has a heart condition so instead take a folder of his work! Next is a medium, Harriet (Tiffany Hadish), who works at bar mitzvahs. They think she is a con artist until she senses that Gabbie is part of their story. The medium con artist who has potential is very much like Whoopi Goldberg’s Oda Mae Brown in Ghost (1990). Still, all of the similarities are made fresh with the actors and script. 

At the mansion, Ben sees Travis run from bullies, his isolation and self-confidence is part of his character’s arc. At the dining room, Harriet detects a grieving spirit, grief is one of the important themes of the movie. They find from the research that the first owner was William Gracey, we later see his spirit in the form of J.R. Adduci, he had a cameo in the Stranger Things episode, “Papa” (2022). They find from the research that the mansion was discovered to be fully built in 1758! William Gracey was the first owner and his wife, Eleanor, had died from yellow fever. Elenor’s ghost is played by Erika Coleman who had a cameo in the “Glorious Purpose” (2021) pilot of Loki. Gracey’s character came from a 2005 Slave Labor Graphics comic series and also from the Master Gracey tombstone at the attraction. There is also the story of the two brothers who died in a duel. The Duelists are played by Chad Crumley and Sebastien Soudais, both stuntmen in this film. There are of course more of the 999 ghosts! Harriet leaves, but two hours later returns. The Dream Team is later joined by Professor Bruce and also discover Madame Leota who may help them fight the Hatbox Ghost who is using the mansion ghosts and needs one more! Haunted Mansion shows love of the attraction with a few chills, some very human stories, and is very funny. 

Five Ghost Particles out of Five! 

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